Thank you for purchasing the Infant 2011, model LX Female. The Infant 2011 is equipped with all the latest technologies for optimum performance. These include:
- A powerful sound system
- Automatic cuteness display
- Side-impact airbags
- Vacuum capabilities
- 100% money-back guarantee*
*not a guarantee
If only it was this easy right? I've been looking for a manual for some time now, but Amy has yet to pop one out. So I thought I would come up with my own!
Are you having trouble changing your newborn's socks? Fret not! Follow these easy steps and soon you and your baby will be enjoying warm, toasty feet.
1) Turn the socks inside out.
2) Grab the baby's little foot. Don't worry, you won't hurt him/her.
3) Try to put the sock on the baby's foot by rolling it right-side out against the foot.
4) Give up once the toes get stuck
5) Stretch out sock opening
6) Grab baby's foot again.
7) Scoot baby off the edge of the changing table
8) Grab baby's foot again
9) Try to fit the sock onto the foot by stretching it over the toes.
10) repeat steps 4 through 9.
11) Roll the sock up so it's as short as possible.
12) Grab the baby's foot
13) Try to put the sock on the baby's foot.
14) Pick up the sock from the floor after baby kicks it away.
15) Soothe the baby
16) Grab the baby's foot
17) Soothe the baby
18) Try to force the sock onto the foot by wiggling it back and forth
19) Give up when the toes get stuck
20) Throw socks on the floor and wrap the baby in a blanket.
Congratulations! You have just learned how to put a sock on a baby!
Just remember that when she is old enough to start crawling about, which will be sooner than later, just leave the socks off! She needs her little toes and feet free to figure out how to push herself forward, and with socks on it is too slippery! Hey, my life as a dancer has to have SOME useful information!
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