One of the things my wife and I have been thinking and talking about is how we are going to be handling family traditions. Of course, almost every family has to go through this; which traditions from which family do we want to keep, and which family will we be visiting for which holiday (or visiting us)? We are truly a neolocal society now, and this threatens a lot of traditions. Although our parents all live in the same area, we live hundreds of miles from them, hundreds of miles from my sisters, 2 hours from my brother, thousands of miles from my extended family, and across the country from my brother-in-law. There is no family near us. We have friends, of course, but we will be moving not too far from now, and they won't be. It hits me a lot harder than I thought it would, probably because at times I a can be extremely extroverted. Back in college, when I lived with my family, I had dozens of friends I could see at any moment, and did see every day. Traditions were easy to make and easy to keep.
Despite being so far from our families, I had always thought, even as a child, that there would be certain traditions, certain experiences that I would share with my own children. One of them... is gone now. And perhaps permanently. I remember going to the Flying W Ranch as a child, and I went almost every time I visited Colorado Springs. It was always fun to see the old west town, to visit the stores, to try the food, to listen to the cowboy music sung by the Flying W Wranglers. I stirred the imagination as a child, and as an adult it makes me nostalgic. Or at least it used to...
According to this article from the NY Times, the Flying W Ranch is gone. I knew it was in danger when my relatives who live near it told us it was surrounded by flames. But now, it is confirmed gone. The wildfires that ravaged the West have burnt everything to cinders, and the band is running out of money. It seems unlikely that it will be rebuilt or that the band will survive. I always imagined going there with Adelaide, seeing the look on her face, buying her a cowboy hat, showing her how to hold the little metal plate so she wouldn't burn herself. I feel like a piece of my childhood was destroyed and a piece of my future robbed from not only me, but my entire family.
Friday, July 6, 2012
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Quirks
One of the biggest joys of being a parent, I'm finding, is learning what your child is like. What does she enjoy? What does she hate? What does she imitate? However, I feel that this is also one of things that can easily got lost over the years. I thought it would be good to keep a bit of a chronicle of the things Adelaide has done which are incredibly cute.
For starters, she is definitely musical. She has always bobbed and danced to music, even while we're eating. She loves her little toy piano and ipod, especially now that she has figured out how they work a little better. We have been exposing her to all sorts of music - from artists such as the Beatles, Ladysmith Black Mambazo, Mozart, Queen, Yes, Gorillaz, Duran Duran, Faure, Tempest, Dream Theater, Bob Dylan, Geckt, Louis Armstrong, and Beethoven, among others. And she seems to like it all! When we watch recorded concerts on Netflix, she claps whenever the song ends. She'll clap all the time now, and has even learned how to make sound with it!
She also has learned to wave, which she does when she meets people, when people are leaving, or just because! She now says "kitty!" and squeals at the cat. She hasn't learned how to pet without hurting the cats yet, but she tries! She is definitely an animal lover, and squeals at every animal under the sun, even the squirrels, or things on TV.
We went to the Children's Museum a little while ago, where there is a market for kids to pretend they are shopping. She loved to push around the cart and put oranges and syrup into it over and over. I've caught her doing that many times with other things. She is definitely imitating us! Sometimes we can make a game of it, where she copies what we're doing.
I'm very glad she's become more independent than she was. Now she likes to play with other kids, and will even want to be left alone to play with others, while earlier it was a struggle to get her to take more than a few steps from us. Now she likes the bath tub, too! She loves to play with water, and will even go towards the "deep" end to stay in a little bit longer. :D
She's been walking since she was 9 months, and for a long time looked like a drunken sailor after a binge. But she always picks herself up and wants to go on her own. Getting her to hold our hands is a challenge! She loves to play "catch me if you can", which always ends in her being caught, falling over, and giggling! She also giggles when I give her a zerbert/raspberry on her belly, or even when I just act like I'm going to. Same with tickling; I don't even have to touch her to make her giggle. She gets it from me...
At the moment she is sleeping on me, so I will close this post before she wakes up and tries to add typing to her repertoire.
For starters, she is definitely musical. She has always bobbed and danced to music, even while we're eating. She loves her little toy piano and ipod, especially now that she has figured out how they work a little better. We have been exposing her to all sorts of music - from artists such as the Beatles, Ladysmith Black Mambazo, Mozart, Queen, Yes, Gorillaz, Duran Duran, Faure, Tempest, Dream Theater, Bob Dylan, Geckt, Louis Armstrong, and Beethoven, among others. And she seems to like it all! When we watch recorded concerts on Netflix, she claps whenever the song ends. She'll clap all the time now, and has even learned how to make sound with it!
She also has learned to wave, which she does when she meets people, when people are leaving, or just because! She now says "kitty!" and squeals at the cat. She hasn't learned how to pet without hurting the cats yet, but she tries! She is definitely an animal lover, and squeals at every animal under the sun, even the squirrels, or things on TV.
We went to the Children's Museum a little while ago, where there is a market for kids to pretend they are shopping. She loved to push around the cart and put oranges and syrup into it over and over. I've caught her doing that many times with other things. She is definitely imitating us! Sometimes we can make a game of it, where she copies what we're doing.
I'm very glad she's become more independent than she was. Now she likes to play with other kids, and will even want to be left alone to play with others, while earlier it was a struggle to get her to take more than a few steps from us. Now she likes the bath tub, too! She loves to play with water, and will even go towards the "deep" end to stay in a little bit longer. :D
She's been walking since she was 9 months, and for a long time looked like a drunken sailor after a binge. But she always picks herself up and wants to go on her own. Getting her to hold our hands is a challenge! She loves to play "catch me if you can", which always ends in her being caught, falling over, and giggling! She also giggles when I give her a zerbert/raspberry on her belly, or even when I just act like I'm going to. Same with tickling; I don't even have to touch her to make her giggle. She gets it from me...
At the moment she is sleeping on me, so I will close this post before she wakes up and tries to add typing to her repertoire.
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
1 year...
I know I do not post on here. But if you do run across this post, I would like to commemorate a full year with my daughter! Adelaide is now official a 1-year-old! It has been a long year for me, with a lot of adjusting. But when I look back, it has seemed to go by quickly. To be honest, that worries me. I don't want to miss any of my daughter's life, but at the same time I don't want to miss my own. I have a feeling adjusting is something that is ongoing when it comes to kids.
Today we went to the Greenville Zoo. We have a membership there, so we do go rather often. Today, however, it was very busy. I let Addy walk around on her own most of the time, and I tried to take pictures, though it is certainly difficult to take a picture of a squirmy, inquisitive little girl while trying to prevent her from falling off ledges and tumbling down stairs. She also fed some of the animals (or attempted to at least) and she had her first sandwich, french fries, and snow cone! Pictures have been taken... who knows, perhaps I will post some?
Today we went to the Greenville Zoo. We have a membership there, so we do go rather often. Today, however, it was very busy. I let Addy walk around on her own most of the time, and I tried to take pictures, though it is certainly difficult to take a picture of a squirmy, inquisitive little girl while trying to prevent her from falling off ledges and tumbling down stairs. She also fed some of the animals (or attempted to at least) and she had her first sandwich, french fries, and snow cone! Pictures have been taken... who knows, perhaps I will post some?
Sunday, June 19, 2011
First Father's Day
So today is my first Father's Day as a daddy! We're just spending it relaxing at home - the real celebration was yesterday. We went into the nearby city, Greenville, and hung out downtown. We even got to see Shakespeare in the park! It was a pretty good day - I could get used to this.
However, fatherly duties do not go away on father's day. Adelaide is 2 1/2 months old now and getting bigger. She's also starting to eat a lot and cry more than she used to, particularly when she gets tired. As her now primary caretaker, she's taking just about all of my time and I'm really craving adult interaction. Since my writing has taken a hit, I've found that I want to roleplay more, but no one around me plays the game I want to. Still, Adelaide is my first priority. I'll just have to take whatever time I can get to do my writing, even though it means it'll take longer than I thought.
However, fatherly duties do not go away on father's day. Adelaide is 2 1/2 months old now and getting bigger. She's also starting to eat a lot and cry more than she used to, particularly when she gets tired. As her now primary caretaker, she's taking just about all of my time and I'm really craving adult interaction. Since my writing has taken a hit, I've found that I want to roleplay more, but no one around me plays the game I want to. Still, Adelaide is my first priority. I'll just have to take whatever time I can get to do my writing, even though it means it'll take longer than I thought.
Friday, May 27, 2011
Milkpocalypse
Lesson 24: Do not put anything of value near the baby at any time. Especially if it's paper or electronic.
I narrowly avoided disaster with this one. For a while I have been putting Adelaide in my lap while typing on my laptop (yes, they will both fit just fine). It's really the only way to make her happy and allow me time to write my novel. Now, I think this may have been causing some pains in my forearms, but there is another reason not to do this.
This morning, I was considering looking up my email after feeding Adelaide, but thankfully I turned my computer off last night and was feeling too lazy to turn it back on this morning. I then considered getting my PS3 controller so I could do something while keeping her upright after she ate. You should keep a baby upright for a while after eating to minimize spitting up. Now, this doesn't always work. Adelaide's stomach has developed a way of becoming dormant, not processing any food until the exactly moment you lay her down. This could be 2 minutes later, or 2 hours later. Either way, once you lay her down, spit up will soon follow. Unfortunately, this is not ALWAYS the case.
Thankfully, I decided against getting the PS3 controller. We're trying to keep her from watching too much TV or looking at our computer screens, which is going to be hard on us. I did, however, put on a movie and turned her away from it. So here is the sequence of events. First, I fed her in a mostly upright position, a position I was told was optimum for feeding and keeping food down. Then, I burped her. She always burps twice, though the word "belch" might be more appropriate. I find she always expels gasses vociferously. After burping her, I sat her upright in my lap until he fussed for more milk. I fed her again, burped her again, sat her upright again. Seems I was doing everything right. Then, without provocation or warning, she lets loose a slurry of off-white vomit akin to a Las Vegas fountain. It reminded me vaguely of the scene in a certain Alien movie where a large, black, Gigerian claw skewers the android known as Bishop. I could physically feel her get lighter as the milk pours out of her and down my leg. It forms a pool of putridness around me in the chair. The ottoman is hit, the carpet is covered, and my clothes are soaked. I half expected her little head to swivel around 180 degrees, look at up me, and spit a volley of curses in latin and other languages, most of which had been long forgotten. I am convinced that the stomachs of babies are the one exception to the law of Conservation of Mass and Energy. There was no earthly way I put that much liquid into this small child. This was just as my wife pulled up in the car. I used the burp cloth to try soaking up as much of the mess as I could so I could open the door for her.
While I was in the shower, it occurred to me that, had I been on my computer, or had I been holding a playstation controller, the device would have met an untimely demise. Babies and electronics do not mix. It is like having a small explosive device near you at all times. You must keep it close, care for it, clean it, feed it, but at any moment it could go off and destroy that which you just spent several thousand hard-earned dollars on.
So, I am going to have to learn to put the baby down and NOT pick her up when she fusses. It is the only way to get her to learn that we are still here and she is still perfectly all right. And if I don't, I will never get anything done. I will lose my ability to write and with it, my sanity.
I narrowly avoided disaster with this one. For a while I have been putting Adelaide in my lap while typing on my laptop (yes, they will both fit just fine). It's really the only way to make her happy and allow me time to write my novel. Now, I think this may have been causing some pains in my forearms, but there is another reason not to do this.
This morning, I was considering looking up my email after feeding Adelaide, but thankfully I turned my computer off last night and was feeling too lazy to turn it back on this morning. I then considered getting my PS3 controller so I could do something while keeping her upright after she ate. You should keep a baby upright for a while after eating to minimize spitting up. Now, this doesn't always work. Adelaide's stomach has developed a way of becoming dormant, not processing any food until the exactly moment you lay her down. This could be 2 minutes later, or 2 hours later. Either way, once you lay her down, spit up will soon follow. Unfortunately, this is not ALWAYS the case.
Thankfully, I decided against getting the PS3 controller. We're trying to keep her from watching too much TV or looking at our computer screens, which is going to be hard on us. I did, however, put on a movie and turned her away from it. So here is the sequence of events. First, I fed her in a mostly upright position, a position I was told was optimum for feeding and keeping food down. Then, I burped her. She always burps twice, though the word "belch" might be more appropriate. I find she always expels gasses vociferously. After burping her, I sat her upright in my lap until he fussed for more milk. I fed her again, burped her again, sat her upright again. Seems I was doing everything right. Then, without provocation or warning, she lets loose a slurry of off-white vomit akin to a Las Vegas fountain. It reminded me vaguely of the scene in a certain Alien movie where a large, black, Gigerian claw skewers the android known as Bishop. I could physically feel her get lighter as the milk pours out of her and down my leg. It forms a pool of putridness around me in the chair. The ottoman is hit, the carpet is covered, and my clothes are soaked. I half expected her little head to swivel around 180 degrees, look at up me, and spit a volley of curses in latin and other languages, most of which had been long forgotten. I am convinced that the stomachs of babies are the one exception to the law of Conservation of Mass and Energy. There was no earthly way I put that much liquid into this small child. This was just as my wife pulled up in the car. I used the burp cloth to try soaking up as much of the mess as I could so I could open the door for her.
While I was in the shower, it occurred to me that, had I been on my computer, or had I been holding a playstation controller, the device would have met an untimely demise. Babies and electronics do not mix. It is like having a small explosive device near you at all times. You must keep it close, care for it, clean it, feed it, but at any moment it could go off and destroy that which you just spent several thousand hard-earned dollars on.
So, I am going to have to learn to put the baby down and NOT pick her up when she fusses. It is the only way to get her to learn that we are still here and she is still perfectly all right. And if I don't, I will never get anything done. I will lose my ability to write and with it, my sanity.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
8 weeks old
It's strange that I can hardly tell the difference day by day in how much Adelaide is growing, but other people tell me all the time that she's getting bigger.
It's also strange that people ask which of us she looks like the most. Can't they see? I mean, she doesn't really have many features that aren't hidden by baby fat, so how are we supposed to know who she "looks like more"?
But one thing I must say. There is no better conversation starter than a really young baby. Just walking around the normal crowd at church brings oohs and aahs and people wanting to tell their own anecdotes (some of which aren't too encouraging). Now if only she didn't have us wrapped around her tiny little finger already...
It's also strange that people ask which of us she looks like the most. Can't they see? I mean, she doesn't really have many features that aren't hidden by baby fat, so how are we supposed to know who she "looks like more"?
But one thing I must say. There is no better conversation starter than a really young baby. Just walking around the normal crowd at church brings oohs and aahs and people wanting to tell their own anecdotes (some of which aren't too encouraging). Now if only she didn't have us wrapped around her tiny little finger already...
Saturday, May 14, 2011
School's Out
I finished the semester last week. Finally. Now I am taking care of Adelaide more so that my wife can work and so that she can go back to pursuing her PhD.
It is a bit of a challenge. We are learning together, but since Amy has been doing most of the baby-chores, I am now having to pick them up and learn how to do everything on my own.
I have to say that two things are a major, major help. One of the biggest problems I have is that Adelaide doesn't want me to put her down. If I do put her down, she cries after a few minutes. Now, I am not ALWAYS holding her, but she is being held for a good deal of time. This makes it difficult to get her bottles ready, to prepare my own food, to look for work, to write my story... to do anything that requires either getting up and moving or using my hands. In other words, I've become an expert at watching TV. The first item, however, lets me carry her around while keeping my hands free!
The Ergo Carrier is like a backpack, worn on the front, with a baby in it. She's up against my body, so she gets my warmth and smell and all of that which she likes. It also keeps her up tight, so she feels safe and will often go to sleep or at least stop fussing when she is in it. I can bounce, which bounces her, which calms her. I also have two free hands to let me take care of Amy, her, and myself. The one disadvantage is that putting the Ergo on is difficult to do without a partner. It is not, however, impossible. The upper strap on the back has to be high enough that I can reach behind my head to clip it in, not behind my back. This will become easier as Adelaide grows.
The other problems we have been having is keeping her asleep at night. Now, she doesn't wake up all the time, but she gets hungry at about 9, when Amy goes to bed. So I feed her until about 9:30 or 10 or so. Then she starts to fall asleep, but will only stay asleep if I hold her. After about 30 minutes, I feel safe putting her down. That's when I get to work. In a little bit, she fusses because I need to change her, then I need to feed her again, and the cycle repeats until 1 or 2 in the morning, when she gets more tired. She will still wake up in the middle of the night for no apparent reason other than wanting to be held. At about 4 or 5, she'll wake up wanting to be changed and fed. By that time, it's too late to try to go back to bed, so Amy just stays up and starts her day.
For the past few days, I have been swaddling Adelaide every night. It takes a little practice, but I'm pretty good at it now. The Miracle Blanket works very well! I'll put her in it at around 10. I then hold her, which is much easier when she's a baby burrito, until she falls asleep. Then, I can put her down and she won't wake up. In fact, she doesn't wake up until the morning, when she starts getting hungry. And usually a pacifier or my finger will be enough to tide her over until we want to get up. Sometimes she does wake up while being swaddled, but she's a lot less fussy and doesn't complain about things. She just sits that and looks around. Feeding her a cinch, too, since her little hands don't get in the way.
So, if you have been having the same troubles I have, try these two ideas: a carrier of some sort and swaddling cloths. It doesn't have to be these two exact products, either. Amy likes using a Moby wrap and a ring sling. Most of these carrier provide several different options for carrying the baby as well, such as over the back or at the hip. I have also managed to swaddle Adelaide in a particularly large burp cloth (which, by the way, are lifesavers). The secret to swaddling is to first bind her arms, then bind her feet. Finally, wrap the remaining cloth around the baby so that the two bindings are locked into place. It keeps her from moving and makes her feel like she's in the womb again.
It is a bit of a challenge. We are learning together, but since Amy has been doing most of the baby-chores, I am now having to pick them up and learn how to do everything on my own.
I have to say that two things are a major, major help. One of the biggest problems I have is that Adelaide doesn't want me to put her down. If I do put her down, she cries after a few minutes. Now, I am not ALWAYS holding her, but she is being held for a good deal of time. This makes it difficult to get her bottles ready, to prepare my own food, to look for work, to write my story... to do anything that requires either getting up and moving or using my hands. In other words, I've become an expert at watching TV. The first item, however, lets me carry her around while keeping my hands free!
The Ergo Carrier is like a backpack, worn on the front, with a baby in it. She's up against my body, so she gets my warmth and smell and all of that which she likes. It also keeps her up tight, so she feels safe and will often go to sleep or at least stop fussing when she is in it. I can bounce, which bounces her, which calms her. I also have two free hands to let me take care of Amy, her, and myself. The one disadvantage is that putting the Ergo on is difficult to do without a partner. It is not, however, impossible. The upper strap on the back has to be high enough that I can reach behind my head to clip it in, not behind my back. This will become easier as Adelaide grows.
The other problems we have been having is keeping her asleep at night. Now, she doesn't wake up all the time, but she gets hungry at about 9, when Amy goes to bed. So I feed her until about 9:30 or 10 or so. Then she starts to fall asleep, but will only stay asleep if I hold her. After about 30 minutes, I feel safe putting her down. That's when I get to work. In a little bit, she fusses because I need to change her, then I need to feed her again, and the cycle repeats until 1 or 2 in the morning, when she gets more tired. She will still wake up in the middle of the night for no apparent reason other than wanting to be held. At about 4 or 5, she'll wake up wanting to be changed and fed. By that time, it's too late to try to go back to bed, so Amy just stays up and starts her day.
For the past few days, I have been swaddling Adelaide every night. It takes a little practice, but I'm pretty good at it now. The Miracle Blanket works very well! I'll put her in it at around 10. I then hold her, which is much easier when she's a baby burrito, until she falls asleep. Then, I can put her down and she won't wake up. In fact, she doesn't wake up until the morning, when she starts getting hungry. And usually a pacifier or my finger will be enough to tide her over until we want to get up. Sometimes she does wake up while being swaddled, but she's a lot less fussy and doesn't complain about things. She just sits that and looks around. Feeding her a cinch, too, since her little hands don't get in the way.
So, if you have been having the same troubles I have, try these two ideas: a carrier of some sort and swaddling cloths. It doesn't have to be these two exact products, either. Amy likes using a Moby wrap and a ring sling. Most of these carrier provide several different options for carrying the baby as well, such as over the back or at the hip. I have also managed to swaddle Adelaide in a particularly large burp cloth (which, by the way, are lifesavers). The secret to swaddling is to first bind her arms, then bind her feet. Finally, wrap the remaining cloth around the baby so that the two bindings are locked into place. It keeps her from moving and makes her feel like she's in the womb again.
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